The Special One: José Mário dos Santos Félix Mourinho

Translator, style icon and wit, it’s The Special One. José Mário dos Santos Félix Mourinho may be Portuguese, but that doesn’t prevent him being a classy gent.

Ahead in the Spanish league, Jose’s Real Madrid look set to be Spanish champions this year. He can add that to his Portuguese, English and Italian titles, alongside two Champions league titles and a plethora of domestic cups. But it’s not his remarkable success that marks him out, let’s take a look;

Philosopher

Jose is famed for his ability to bring complex philosophical arguments to the masses through sport;

Exemplary manners

Show me a classy gent talking with his mouth full, and I’ll show you a fraudster;

Enemies

Jose has always been a big fan of Paul Newman, acknowledging “a man without enemies is a man with no character”

“On 17 August 2011, in the final of the 2011 Supercopa de España, Mourinho was seen gouging the eye of Barcelona’s assistant coach Tito Vilanova during a brawl at the end of the game. After the game Mourinho did not comment on the incident except to claim that he did not know who “Pito” Vilanova was, with Pito being Spanish slang for penis” 

Magnanimous in victory

Jose ensures he always shows respect to his vanquished foes especially to those battling further down the football pyramid

Dislike of Abroad

His inherent classiness is perhaps best displayed by his desire to return to England having failed to settle in the etiquette vacuum that is southern Europe. Jose has found neither the ‘great’ cities of Milan nor Madrid stand up in comparison to the numerous idyllic commuter villages found on the M4 corridor.  Doubtless the opportunity to draw a wage in the Queens currency, instead of the ghastly euro provides an extra boon. Time to come back Jose, Uxbridge awaits.